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Vintage Audio - If You Want To Find The Sergeant Major

British infantry sergeant Click to download as MP3

Reproduced below are lyrics to the popular wartime British song, If You Want to Find the Sergeant Major (also commonly known as The Old Barbed Wire).

The song itself is a traditional tune with the words changed to suit a given set of circumstances.  As such the song's lyrics were readily adapted to a wartime environment.  When sung by men in the trenches the lyrics often took on a bawdy tone.

Use the player above to listen to a short extract from a variation of the song performed by the Roosters Concert Party some eleven years after the war in 1929.

If You Want to Find the Sergeant Major

If you want to find the sergeant,
I know where he is, I know where he is.
If you want to find the sergeant,
I know where he is,
He's lying on the canteen floor,
I've seen him, I've seen him,
Lying on the canteen floor,
I've seen him,
Lying on the canteen floor.

If you want to find the quarter-bloke,
I know where he is, I know where he is.
If you want to find the quarter-bloke,
I know where he is,
He's miles and miles behind the line,
I've seen him, I've seen him,
Miles and miles behind the line,
I've seen him,
Miles and miles and miles behind the line.

If you want to find the sergeant-major
I know where he is, I know where he is.
If you want to find the sergeant-major
I know where he is,
He's boozing up the private's rum.
I've seen him, I've seen him,
Boozing up the private's rum.
I've seen him,
Boozing up the private's rum.

If you want to find the CO,
I know where he is, I know where he is.
If you want to find the CO,
I know where he is,
He's down in the deep dug-outs.
I've seen him, I've seen him,
Down in the deep dug-outs
I've seen him,
Down in the deep dug-outs.

If you want to find the old battalion,
I know where they are, I know where they are.
If you want to find the old battalion,
I know where they are,
They're hanging on the old barbed wire.
I've seen 'em, I've seen 'em,
Hanging on the old barbed wire,
I've seen 'em, I've seen 'em,
Hanging on the old barbed wire.

A "gutzer" was slang for a stroke of bad luck.

- Did you know?

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